I am the honorable flamingo. What you read here might make you smile, make you think, or make you wonder. This is the world as I see it, from the view of a pink, long legged, slightly awkward bird.

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Bush Approval Ratings Hit New Low

In the midst of a War on Terror, a stagnant economy, and a still unsuccessful game of hide-and-seek with Osama bin Laden, the President's job approval rating dropped to just 33% this past week. Despite the numbers, Bush continues to insist he is doing a great job, and said yesterday he was even considering giving himself a promotion. "You know, sometimes I wonder why I am only the leader of the free world", Bush said, "when there is so much of the world under tyrannical and military rule that I could control."

Although the President dismissed the new ratings, Republicans are becoming concerned. Many feel that if things continue as they are going, the party may have trouble gathering support for another candidate. Some high ranking party members have started to compile a list of people they feel have what it takes to win the election, and so far, they only have one option: Jesus of Nazareth. "It's going to take a miracle", said Republican National Committee Chair Ken Mehlmen, "and who better to provide it." Mehlman then added, "either he or the Supreme Court."

But with all the speculation, the President can't be too happy with the ratings collected over the past weeks. The current support level places him somewhere between Timothy McVeigh, and the guy who did the voice for the giant pitcher of Kool-Aid.

With support waning for his administration, and many people calling for the resignation of Donald Rumsfeld, one can only expect that George Bush is beginning to look to the legacy that he will leave behind when he goes out of office. He will most likely be looked upon as the President who sent the nation into an ill-advised war and increased the national debt and unemployment, but still didn't sleep with a hideous intern. With all the public opinion that is working agains the President, I think there is probably only one way to save his legacy, which is why I have chosen the perfect nominee for the Republican Party: Tom Cruise.

3 comments:

D said...

Hey, the Kool Aid man's approval rating is 100% in my book! Unless the guy who did the voice is some sort of weirdo perv, in which case, it's not Kool Aid man's fault! Oh yeaaaaaaah!

Ronald Knee said...

When you say "The President" who do you actually mean? The bloke behind the scenes with the REAL power, selling bits of the USA to the Saudis OR that half witted shite-fer-brains who they call "dubya" who has to employ a bloke to tie his shoelaces for him????

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