I am the honorable flamingo. What you read here might make you smile, make you think, or make you wonder. This is the world as I see it, from the view of a pink, long legged, slightly awkward bird.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Single Handedly Boost Your Income!

We can all use more money, and what better way to pad your wallet then getting paid to move on yourself like Patton on Sicily. That's right, if you have ever wanted to have a child or ten, only to be plagued by thoughts of "I'm too lazy, irresponsible, hideously ugly" then sperm donation is just the thing for you.

Becoming a sperm donor is not easy, and while you may have honed your ability to perfection with years of sitting in front of the television, computer screen, or older sister's bedroom, in this case, it's what's on the inside that counts. Just remember, if you get turned down because you happen to be sperm deficient, or you happen to be full of physically disabled sperm, who just can't swim very well, chances are you will never live it down, so give you're best effort the first time.

So now I say to you, go, go where every man has gone before, sometimes more than once a day, and actually get paid to do it. Be proud, you're living the American dream, and nothing can take that away, except perhaps a girlfriend, a vasectomy, or a photo of Margaret Thatcher. But enjoy it while it lasts, because who knows how long you have before your child manufacturing job falls victim to outsourcing.

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