The New Face Of Bible Literalism

After years of searching for the boat that legend (and by legend I mean the unerring word of God) says held the ancient Noah, his three sons, three daughters, bunches of domesticated animals, and two of everything else, Johan Huibers has gotten fed up. In fact, he's so fed up he's building his own.

He worked hard to make everything just as it would have been in Noah's day, even going so far as to build much of the ark by hand, albeit using modern tools. Johan's Ark is only about one-fifth the Biblical recommendations for world flood safety, but I chalk that up to Johan's having a hard time finding an actual 500 year old man to help him build it.

The Ark will act as a sort of museum for creationist children, where they will be able to go to learn about the real science of the world, including a brief theater show in which children watch a scientific recreation of the Ark story. If you would like to watch this without going to Holland, than you can just rent the Disney cartoon Fantasia, because that's what Johan will be showing.

Johan has said that he hopes in building the museum to renew the interest in Christianity in the Netherlands. He also plans to bring the ark to several cities in Belgium and Germany, with the goal of eventually annoying people all across Europe with his giant boat.

But this story got me thinking. If we can bring credibility to the Ark story just by building one, perhaps we can do the same for other Bible stories. Imagine the excitement for God we will cause once we start building our Tower to Heaven. We will joyously remind people of the truth about how God saw humanity united as one in the greatest public works project ever, then destroyed their building, and to add insult to injury, even made some of them British.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get to work on my Knowledge of Good and Evil seed.